I didn't say 'nipples' once!

So, the battle of the breast pump has been ongoing. The battle is all in my head, really, but I continue to hate pumping like cats hate water. Cats can swim, see, and I can pump. I just don't like it. *hiss*

What I hate about it is the stupid ceremony of it all. Sterilizing the bottles and bits, drying them out, assembling them, hooking up the tubes to the machine, hooking up the machine to the bottles, attaching them to myself, pumping, emptying the bottles into the milk containers, labeling them, rinsing out the bottles and bits and setting them out for later, putting away the tubes and labels and putting away the machine. When you're nursing you just stick the baby on your breast. You don't boil either of them first.

Sigh.

I'd been intending to learn to hand express. I'd read about it a bit and thought it sounded like a good idea in case I ever found myself without a breast pump around and needed to express. After reading about it even more, though, it sounded like something that I could possibly do as a substitute for using the machine. It's supposed to be good for mastitis and also produce more milk than pumping, something I'm interested in because I'm a bit stressed about providing enough milk. So, I've tried it a few times and tonight I was able to hand express instead of pumping altogether!

Woot indeed, because it knocks out a ton of the annoying steps from the pumping ceremony and I can express straight into the collecting containers instead of having to sterilize anything. All I have to have is clean hands and then I label the container and stick it in the fridge. Pretty sweet.

Also I am still nervous about the lactation consultant cornering me in the NICU and asking me all kinds of questions. Yesterday I was sitting beside Shaughnessy's incubator and the LC was helping a mom with nursing her preemie for the first time. I was glad she was otherwise occupied, but when Shaughnessy's nurse noticed the LC she asked me if I had any breastfeeding questions or anything. I was all, "NO, I'M FINE, MY SUPPLY IS FINE, IT'S ALL FINE, THANKS VERY MUCH!"

Instead of taking the hint she went over to the LC, who was finished with the other mom and washing her hands at the sink, and said, "I have a mom over here you might want to chat with and see if she has any questions."

I told Andrew today that when this kind of thing goes down my instincts are all, "Cheese it, it's the Lactation Consultant!" I didn't run away, scramble or flee; I just gritted my teeth and tried to make it quick by being all immediately confident about my milk supply. She went ahead and quizzed me about how many times a day I pump and how much I think I produce each time. I exaggerated a bit, but then she wrote it down! So now my exaggerations are recorded and I could be caught in my exaggerations at a future date. Dang it.

I just don't want to talk about my boobs to people (who don't read this weblog, I guess.) My boobs are private boobs and I will not let my daughter starve! My hope is that Shaughnessy will take to breast feeding fairly easily and I can put this pumping jazz behind us. In the meantime I can at least alternate hand expressing with machine pumping to make it a bit less irritating!